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THINK YOU KNOW IT ALL??? Las Vegas ranks as the fastest-growing metropolitan area in the nation this decade, according to The Wall Street Journal. Each month, 5,000 to 6,000 people move here, bringing a variety of skills to a job market that has seen 4 to 9 percent growth in recent years. The business environment is so healthy that the region of 1.2 million residents will boast an estimated 31.5 percent increase in jobs between 1992 and 2004....The more you know about LAS VEGAS, the better you will do on the quiz below. Most answers can be found on our pages of this website!
- NAME THE CASINO
- NAME THE GAME
- NAME THE RESTURANT
- BECOME ELIGIBLE FOR A TRIP TO LAS
VEGAS!
- LIVE SPORT SCORES
- VOTE FOR YOUR FAVORITE CASINO!
- HOMEA good place to start searching for trivia contest answers
20 questions about gambling and Las Vegas. Get all twenty right and you go into a drawing for a 1 years subscription to one of the magazines listed on our BOOKS PAGE
HOW DO YOU GET HOLY WATER? You boil the hell out of it.
WHAT DO FISH SAY WHEN THEY HIT A CONCRETE WALL? Dam!
WHAT DO ESKIMOS GET FROM SITTING ON THE ICE TOO LONG? Polaroids.
WHAT DO YOU CALL A BOOMERANG THAT DOESN'T WORK? A stick.
WHAT DO YOU CALL CHEESE THAT ISN'T YOURS? Nacho Cheese.
WHAT DO YOU CALL SANTA'S HELPERS? Subordinate Clauses.
WHAT DO YOU CALL FOUR BULLFIGHTERS IN QUICKSAND? Quattro Sinko.
WHAT DO YOU GET FROM A PAMPERED COW? Spoiled milk.
WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN YOU CROSS A SNOWMAN WITH A VAMPIRE? Frostbite.
WHAT LIES AT THE BOTTOM OF THE OCEAN AND TWITCHES? A nervous wreck.
WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN ROAST BEEF AND PEA SOUP? Anyone can roast beef.
WHERE DO YOU FIND A DOG WITH NO LEGS? Right where you left him.
WHY DO GORILLAS HAVE BIG NOSTRILS? Because they have big fingers.
WHY DON'T BLIND PEOPLE LIKE TO SKY DIVE? Because it scares the hell out of the dog.
WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A HARLEY AND A HOOVER? The location of the dirt bag.
WHY DO A PILGRIM'S PANTS ALWAYS FALL DOWN? Because he's wearing his belt buckle on his hat.
WHAT DO YOU CALL SKYDIVING LAWYERS? Skeet.
HOW ARE A TEXAS TORNADO AND A TENNESSEE DIVORCE THE SAME? Somebody's gonna lose a trailer.
Benign................What you be after you be eight.
Bacteria...............Back door to cafeteria.
Barium.................What you do with dead folks.
Cesarean Section.......A neighborhood in Rome.
Catscan................Searching for the cat.
Cauterize..........Made eye contact with her.
Colic...............A sheep dog.
Coma...............A punctuation mark.
D&C................Where Washington is.
Dilate.............To live longer than your kids do.
Enema.............Not a friend.
Fester............Quicker than someone else.
Fibula............A small lie.
G.I.Series.........World Series of military baseball.
Hangnail...........What you hang your coat on.
Impotent...........Distinguished, well known.
Labor Pain..........Getting hurt at work.
Morbid..............A higher offer than I bid.
Nitrates............Cheaper than day rates.
Medical Staff.......A Doctor's cane, sometimes shown with a snake.
Node....................I knew it.
Outpatient..............A person who has fainted.
Pap Smear................A fatherhood test.
Pelvis...................Second cousin to Elvis.
Post Operative...........A letter carrier.
Recovery Room....Place to do upholstery.
Secretion.......Hiding something
Tablet..........A small table to change babies on.
Seizure..........Roman emperor who lived in the Ceasarean Section.
Terminal Illness....Getting sick at the train station.
Tumor...............More than one.
Urine...............Opposite of mine.
Varicose............Near by
Hospital............The biggest building in town, other than Joe's feed warehouse or Franks lumber mill.
1. Only in America......can a pizza get to your house
faster than an ambulance.
2. Only in America......are there handicap parking
places in front of a skating rink.
3. Only in America......do drugstores make the sick
walk all the way to the back of the store to get
their prescriptions while healthy people can buy
cigarettes at the front.
4. Only in America......do people order double
cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.
5. Only in America......do banks leave both doors open
and then chain the pens to the counters.
6. Only in America......do we leave cars worth thousands
of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk
in the garage.
7. Only in America......do we use answering machines to
screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't
miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to
in the first place.
8. Only in America......! do we buy hot dogs in packages
of ten and buns in packages of eight.
9. Only in America......do we use the word 'politics'
to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin
meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking
creatures'.
10. Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM
machines with Braille lettering.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.
On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( and that's the only time I have to work on my hair.)
On a bag of Fritos: ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special?)
On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how??...)
On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's just a suggestion.)
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh!)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only."
On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
SUPER GAMBLING AND LAS VEGAS SITES
